Human Mechanics Insight (Guilt, Dissing, Compromises and Being Too Nice)

Hi,

This post is about some understanding and insight that I need to unload off my consciousness into the blogosphere.

First, about RELATIONSHIPS and DISSING.
It is impossible to enjoy dissing others if you don’t spend your energy doing things you don’t feel like; or, to put another way, if you don’t force yourself to be nice to people you don’t actually like. The energy unload (and hence enjoyment) that can be harvested at dissing needs to be accumulated in you first to feel a relief or some sort of powertrip. And to accumulate it you need to either force yourself to be nice to people you dislike; or in general answer to request when those requests didn’t feel necessary.

I realized this because I never get any positive feeling from putting other people down. And then I realized that my “frame of reference” is so tragically different from the norm; by this I mean that for me there is this higher value called truth. I know truth is completely subjective (this is a crucial fact); but I do put truth, and performance and precision and acuteness and caring above all other values.

Then there are people who put power, and establishment and authority and other people’s expectations above all else. Those are generally the people who end up enjoying to diss (put other’s down) others. I then realized that there WERE other frames of reference; somehow I always thought that there was only one frame of reference. Strange isn’t it?

GUILT
Guilt is an interesting emotion. It needs suport and is entirely artificial; meaning it was created by humans and more precisely by society. Guilt is pushed down our throats at a young age due to the dependency relationship we have as children; we cannot be independant. We depend so much on our parents, and especially on their love. The love we live is a love based on need, a totally different flavor of love compared to the one we have the possiblity to live when fully grown up. Because of this, the parent has power over you; and he can make you do things that are against your will and then give you love in return. This is where the mind comes in and invents the compromise. Now, understand that guilt cannot exist without the support of compromises.

Imagine a situation where you are with a group of people; your friends say, and they all want to go do something which you don’t feel like. “Oh come one, come along”. And yet inside you don’t want. What do you do? There are two things that can happen. First, out of love for your friends and trust in their taste you will follow with an open heart. OR, if your heart is not available, you will compromise. You will go, but you will not like the situation at all and complain silently inside the whole time.

This compromise is the necessary platform that opens the stage for guilt. Once you’ve acquired this behaviour, than you can be expected to compromise and if you don’t; THAT is when guilt is born.

Now if you drop compromise from your life, you will never feel guilt. EVER. I found it an interesting revelation; to never feel guilty. Osho repeats this quite a bit, especially in the series about Tantra. He says to be your full self and never feel guilty about anything. And with this bit of understanding you can now be guilt free naturally once you drop compromises.

BEING NICE TO ERVERYBODY
There is a phenomena that is well documented where the more people you put together, the lower the level of intelligence. There is a movement to the bottom, to find common ground, or the lowest common denominator. That lowest common denominator can cause problems because if you are trying to achieve something it will limit the possibilities. This is why, in human relationships there is a common behavior where we elect leaders (implicitely or explicitely), who can magically gain the trust of people and be an inspiration and lead the group beyond the common denominator.. Now this is a complex phenomenon in itself.

When someone is being nice to everybody, absolutely everybody, he reproduces the behavior of the lowest common denominator within himself. Constantly adapting to every individual is a lot of work; and by being nice to everybody you’d need to adapt to every one. Now if this person is even just slightly lazy the way to achieve similar results (in others loving you) is by finding the lowest common denominator and sticking to it in all situations. So he will always stay with generalized statements, slightly adapt them be he will systematically dumb down any daring circumstance, critize anyone who takes risks, and systematically appeal to your “common sense”.

These people are very dangerous people, especially in business settings. First you cannot trust anything they say, there is an impactful information loss that happens through his presence. Let’s pretend someone reports a problem to him, and he now needs to pass down this information to the person who is in charge of fixing it. When he meets the person who is supposed to fix it, he will not want to say anything that might offend or cause any discomfort in that person, so the information will be downplayed. And hence the problem itself will be downplayed. The problem will be dissolved in his conception of common sense the reduced to his lowest common denominator; and the person who is supposed to fix it will not be able to really fix it as so much information will be missing. With gradual accumulation your business will loose focus in the cloud of confusion, especially if the said person is in a managerial position.

However, they have much appeal. They will appeal to insecure people; in fact they will feed on other people’s insecurity. By seeing how far these people get in any given organization you can actually measure the ambient level of insecurity. There are better ways to deal with insecurity and to let your organization get crippled by clouds of pleasing confusion. Trust me.

That’s it for today.

M

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A day trip to Whiteface Mountain (Vermont)

Yesterday I went hiking at Whiteface Mountain (Vermont) with my friend Yann. It is about 2hrs drive from Montreal, and we left pretty early. Got surprised that the Champlain bridge was closed, had to do many detours; and it was raining a bit when we got there but thankfully as we got closer rain became snow! Here are some pics.

these windows are way too small!

Mexico Airport isn’t pretty

Salut,

Mexico airport isn’t exactly pretty, I mean I think they tried. It is situated on a hill, with incredible views on each side, but you can’t see much of it unfortunately. It has an open air concept which is quite appealing, I like the ‘idea’ behind it, but the execution is probably similar to most modern architecture projets… it looks great on computer screens but in real life.. meh.

That being said, there are quite insteresting things you can do with a camera and the lights there; which are in fact tiny windows to the outside. :)

The beach at Pie de la Cuesta is gone...

Pie De La Cuesta – The Beach is Gone

Pie De La Cuesta is a beach area, just outside of the Acapulco city, to the northwest. I came here in 2000 with three friends, we had driven from Montreal, Canada (not exactly in a straight line mind you). I remember the peace and quiet, and the huge beach, and the even bigger waves that would crash right on the beach itself.

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Incredible Sunsets at Pie De La Cuesta
Incredible Sunsets at Pie De La Cuesta

Today there isn’t much of a beach left.

As you can see. I was here during the development of Tropical Storm Polo; and what’s left of the beach eroded by more than 3 feet overnight. The irony is that the mayor of Acapulco just invested large sums to redo the street at Pie de la Cuesta, concrete, nice sidewalks; but what he should be doing is investing in beach erosion stoppers cause nobody will come here anymore. That and the fact that there is way more plastic on the beach than sea life; and the sheer size of the waves. All they will have left is sunsets!

Flurry API in Mono for Android

Hi Everyone,

We have been using Mono for Android at Taste Filter since may. I love coding in C#, it is much faster than coding in Java with all the shortcuts (events, delegates, actions, etc). Mono for Android is generally very good too.

One thing that is lacking, is the amount of Bindings available for it. We need fairly specific analytics at Taste Filter, since we are introducing new ways to interact with content, new touch enabled controls. We want to know what is going on; how people are interacting with it. Have using Google Analytics isn’t stellar; we want a better tool. More reporting, more information passed to the system gathering the stats.

I tried using the automated process for creating a binding from a JAR, but it didn’t yield good results; lots and lots of errors which I did not understand; didn’t seem to be documented.

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The Notman House Project

First this is purely and entirely my own opinion.

If you go over to the project’s website, you get this little summary:
Built in 1845, Notman House is a historic landmark property located at the intersection of Montreal’s downtown core and creative Plateau neighborhood. It has, thanks to the community‚Äôs role, become a beacon to entrepreneurship, open collaboration and peer-to-peer learning. Currently, Notman House offers short-term office space for early stage technology Startups, office space for venture investors and entrepreneurial support organizations, a co-working space for freelancers, and an event space for Startup and tech community events.

And before that, you get a clear overview of who put money into the project. Those are private firms, investment bodies, and different levels of government. This project is, clearly, backed by all powers that be.

Why isn’t it picking up steam?
I bet some people are scratching their heads right now trying to understand why it hasn’t picked up more steam. I mean they did everything they had to do right?

  • They created a nice video,
  • They were very transparent about the state of things
  • They managed to get a bunch of money from well established investors / public bodies
  • They got plenty of press coverage (la presse, le devoir, to name just 2), everyone in montreal knows about the project I am sure
  • And following well known statistics, you got a big push on the first day because it is known that projects which reach a certain threshold on the first day have a much better success rate.

Technically all the elements are there. But they overlooked something very fundamental in the process. It is so fundamental that even the name of the platform they chose contains the exact reason why it isn’t picking up steam. And what is that?

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Snippet – Converting yyyy-mm-ddThh:mm:ss.mssZ to Date()

Hi,

So, in dealing with the Google Data API most dates use the format above. Here is a regular expression to decompose it:

Now remember that the constructor for the Date object is quite a pain. It considers Januaray to be month 0, and the first day of the month to be the zero’th day of the month.. With this in mind, you can construct the Date object.

Now, switch to the time-zone of the user..

That’s it folks!